Sick of Rainy Days!

I'm frustrated. I'm sick of rainy days, and I'm not feeling well. My eyes are so weak. My skin feels itchy. I just want to feel better. I'm moody. Ignore me for a few days.

I seriously need a boyfriend. I WANT a boyfriend. I don't like being single. I don't think it suits me at all. I'm lonely. I want love and romance and all that jazz.

Sorry this is a crappy excuse for a post, but I don't really have the energy to write. Pray I feel better. 

I will bring you something better in a couple of days.

Too Many Thoughts

I was thinking about how I love to learn. I have a great passion for education.

It's exciting for me to learn a new concept. When I understand a hard concept for the first time, I feel really productive. I enjoy the wisdom that flows from understanding. I truly believe that knowledge is power.

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about Christianity. I think about the questions that no one likes to ask. I've been asking a lot of questions and praying for the answers. I know some of the answers, but not all and that's absolutely fine.

Sometimes, I get a little frustrated with the Universal Church. I love it so much, but I want it to want more for itself. Since the Church is a body of believers, I believe that we all need to work out some of our issues dealing with some controversial topics. I get upset at times with Christians, not all, but a few of the celebrity Christian so called "leaders". I feel like I need to write it down and get rid of the anger. 

My frustration with Christians comes from the fact that numerous Christians are afraid to research the Bible. I think so many people are arrogant because they believe that church leaders know everything, but in reality, there are truly several  pastors that are uneducated and ignorant of the bible in the USA. Many leaders only teach what they have been taught. There are a lot of Christian pastors/leaders that don't really know anything about what they are preaching.

I don't understand why people think this is ok. I don't think it's right. I believe that if we are wrong, we should not be scared to admit that fact. If we are right, we don't need to boast, but we should be humble. Let's rejoice in progress. 

Rain

Sitting in a dark room and listening to the motor of my a/c while a few raindrops hit the roof is very peaceful. I like rain. I guess I enjoy it because it's strange. Rain is something wet falling from the sky that helps plants to grow and turns good dirt into dark mushy mud.

Rain is soothing and sexy. Rain is good! All good things come from God.

Rain is needed. We have to have it. We need the moisture from rain to moisten the soil.  We can't be dry, and neither can the earth be dry. We have to have something that can penetrate our skin, our earth, and, maybe, even our souls. Rain is that something.

I LOVE RAIN!

Realtionships

I hate relationships. I wish I had a relationship with someone. I want to feel close to someone. Is that so bad? I don't know what I want sometimes. I don't want to date. I just want close intimate friendships now.

 But I have a problem, most of my friends are guys, and guys don't like to open up to girls. So, I feel like I'm on the outside all the time. I wish that men would trust me enough to let me in their world. I just want to understand what they feel and what their dreams are, but no no no they never ever let me in.

I don't want to give up, but sometimes it feels like there isn't any hope when it comes to this subject. 

So, I'm gonna try not to push and just let God do the work. 

I'm gonna obey what the Lord tells me to do.

Even when it doesn't make sense.

Life

   God has a purpose 


       for everything


     ...even our pain.